Wedding Wisting

Things are freakishly good right now with the hubs... a very good friend of mine is about to get married, and there's some super sweet chit chat going on at APW about wedding memories. So since I have no idea if I already wrote these things down or not, here's just a few things I will (hopefully) always remember... or at least, I remember after more than 2.5 years:

- my sister saying I looked like Alice in Wonderland peering around the trees, when i was looking for my prince waiting at the other end of the garden for our private moment
- crying the minute I saw him
- not crying from then on for the rest of the wedding day
- sinking my bare toes down into the sand and feeling the stress and excitement melt away into peace and joy
- discovering that my dad had put extreme amounts of thought into both our walk down the aisle and our first dance
- the impromptu addition of my sisters and dad to the laying on of hands my bridesmaids and mom did before i saw chris
- the nausea that permeated the morning prior to that moment
- getting the phone call from my brother in law who couldn't come on the way to get ready
- laughing laughing laughing at the ceremony
- chris's groomsmen beaming at me
- dom picking up my shoes and bringing them to me
- the flowers wilting and dunking them in the fountain to see if they'd revive
- listening to the party going on without us and kind of enjoying it
- the hug i got from my uncle
- the kiss on the cheek i got from ben
- the hugs i got from my cousin's daughter, and her saying i was the prettiest bride she'd ever seen
- stealing as many hors doeuvres as i could before we had to go sit for dinner
- trying to go talk to people while they ate dinner and not making it to more than 2 tables
- running out of sangria and ordering more
- dancing in the circle around the courtyard fountain with all my friends
- dancing dancing dancing in that white dress
- chris's dad dancing with me
- the perfect sunset
- the bubble bath explosion
- clearly choosing to give up the magical sheen surrounding us from getting married and go have brunch with my mom the next morning out of nowhere, as a gift to her.

and it occurs to me, for the first time since then, .... did we start the ceremony late? which is funny because i clearly clearly decided that time did not matter very early on that day... but now i'm curious.

How'm I doin'?? A Goals Update

I say it's high time for a check in on the goals. Especially since I have been starting new goals, like read this book, and go to an amusement park for my 30th birthday (What? I can plan it this far in advance!?). And since my next birthday (i.e. my original goal deadline) is tra la la about 4 months away. God, I just LOVE birthdays!!! (Can you tell?)

So the list. Let's take a look, shall we?

• Attend retreat. - Well, I've thought about doing this a lot. And really what I need to do is pick one at the local retreat center I like, mail in my deposit, and go. But, haven't done that quite yet.
• Climb a 5.9 - Ok, this is hard because I'm not near being able to do this yet. But, I expect to squeeze in some more climbing in the next few months, and perhaps I can get up to that if I'm consistent. So, doable, if I focus.
• Contribute regularly to 401k. - Rocking out. The amount of money going to my 401k was super painful to watch disappear from the paycheck, but now it's out of sight, out of mind (except for feeling great that it's already doubled what I had when I started contributing this year).
• Do the limbo. - Hilarious. Left over from my wedding. No idea how this will get accomplished (since it's not really a one-person activity). So I need help on this...
• Get better physically. - Slow but sure, working on it every day, with the help of some kickass doctors.
• Go backpacking. - This weekend, baby!!!!! We have no idea if our car (since we no longer have the Subaru) will make it to any decent trails, but we'll be outside, and we'll be together, and that is the only thing I care about. Besides, I love an adventure!
• Kayak to the cedars (near my mom's house). - This is the one most likely not to happen (and incidentally, the one that my mom suggested). I'm just not planning a trip up there right now, so I'm not sure how to make it happen. I'm still up for it, in theory.
• Keep a plant alive for a season. - So, this is always a hard one to define. I mean, I have several philodendrons that are rocking out, but those things don't die. My mom gave us a plant at Christmas that is still alive, although I fear for its long-term sustainability. So, yes, accomplished, sort of.
• Knit hat. - I've knitted two rows since writing this. Unless I break a leg, I can't imagine putting serious time into it. The goal was really to get it done before the winter months, and give it to the homeless, but um, it's March.
• Learn a piano song. - My hubs has. Does that count? Maybe that's what I'll do as a present for when he gets home.
• Print a photo I've taken. - Definitely haven't done, but not for a good reason. Let's say this will be my birthday present to myself.
• Run a 5k. - Crap. I'm further behind on this than I am on the climbing. I could try to run again, but probably not for another week.
• Share poetry. - I've done it, but I could do more.
• Stay on 6 month dentist plan. - Whoops. I'll call before the weekend and make the appointment.
• Volunteer. - Major failure, but I also reevaluated this multiple times and decided our lives were too full. I think I will try to do it once my Friday morning class ends, since I have managed to squeeze something into that time slot, so... why not just switch it over?

Oh man, that felt so good! Looking at my goals is a great way to add some direction and structure to my life, as well as get me excited about following through on the in the next few months. And luckily, I don't feel married to any of them, but they all still seem worth pursuing.

I am also going to add a goal - I read this note, and felt somewhat, um, convicted? I think I scored a 5.5, although NOT entirely because of wedding blog reading. So, in order to move on from the wedding, it's time to get the wedding dress cleaned. HIGH time, in fact. It is still on the back of my closet, just as she says. She's so smart!

Ok, here goes the next four months... I'll keep you posted on my progress!

25 Things About Me

1. I speak enough French and Spanish to get by in countries that speak either of those for about 3 hours.

2. I have two different colored eyes. The medical term for this is "heterochromia iridium".

3. I did gymnastics from the age of 4 until I was 12. I loved the parallel bars and the floor routine, which I continued doing in the form of modern dance when I got scared of hurting myself (ie. after I hurt myself enough times).

4. Sometimes, all I want is silence.

5. I have published poems, essays, and scientific papers. And I'm proud of that fact.

6. I loved being an only child. And I loved having older half-siblings.

7. I have always wanted to be a US Supreme Court justice.

8. I think I could eat sushi, pasta, bread and cheese, and salad exclusively forever and never be unhappy.

9. I am one of the least girly girls I know. Makeup, hairstyles, and fashion are mostly lost on me.

10. I love having a beer or a glass of wine at the end of the day.

11. I'm a little bit afraid of dogs.

12. I love going out for breakfast. And lunch. And dinner. And coffee. And drinks.

13. I am learning to trust myself. It took me six months to decide to go back to school for my masters. It took me two years to decide I wanted to get married.

14. I love every place I have lived, and I'm glad I moved so much as a kid, even though it made it hard to feel settled.

15. I played fullback on my high school soccer team, which went from having a losing season my freshman year to being second in the state my senior year. We had a different coach every year, and the team captain was killed in a car crash by a drunk driver my sophomore year. Those girls were my family.

16. I love camping and hiking. Unless it's really cold.

17. I would prefer to live with less possessions than I currently have. I think most people have way more than they need.

18. I skipped kindergarten.

19. I am never ashamed to dance.

20. I am afraid my parents are going to die too soon. I think about this weekly.

21. It takes a lot of effort for me not to be a slob around the house.

22. Someday, I'd like to have a place I could go to get away from it all. In the mountains, by the ocean, I don't care.

23. I have chronic arm pain that can make typing a daily issue. I am sporadically good about doing exercises and icing it.

24. I am afraid that when we move to the northeast, I'm going to get depressed from lack of sunshine.

25. I have vivid, crazy dreams every night.